Are you in a Millennial Marriage?

Typically Millennials are deemed to be those born between 1982 -1997, which would make them between 36-21 today. Just stepping into our prime years and glowing up, many of us are starting to get married. And like everything we touch, Millennials are making their mark on the institution of marriage. So, right now I bet your thinking “How do I know if my marriage is truly millennial?”    Well, you might be in a Millennial Marriage if you…

1. You got married later, usually 26 & up
The median age for marriage has been on a steady increase for the past few decades. Fewer and fewer people are getting married in their early twenties anymore. For our parents, the median age was 22-25  (women & men respectively) but now it’s 26-29! My husband and I actually got married at 25 but to be fair, the wedding was one month before our 26th birthday. This is also the case for having the first child and buying a house. There are many reasons for this (more of us are continuing education past a bachelor’s degree, oh and the crap economy) but the bottom line is, getting married later is a very millennial trait!

2. Social media or an online site is responsible for your relationship
With the amount of screen time we get each day and the popularity of dating apps like Tindr and Bumble, no one should be surprised at this. It’s true that I met my husband in kindergarten and knew him during middle school, but we are together this day because we reconnected after years of not speaking on Facebook. Unlike our parents, us millennials don’t look down on or feel shy about meeting, dating or reconnecting via app. Just watch out for the catfish!

3. You both are addicted to your phones and that’s fine
No matter how many studies and think pieces (aka stink pieces) they put out condemning our phone usage, we press on! For the most part, the internet and constant connection aren’t helping to destroy already solid relationships. They are just another way to interact. Millennial couples are constantly tagging each other in funny, relatable meme’s on social sites, sending gifs and on occasion, having conversations entirely in gifs! We usually skip the normal phone call and opt to FaceTime, just like we generally text each other more than we talk on the phone. Don’t worry, it isn’t all bad mom, it’s just the way we do it!

4. The music at your wedding was mostly from the 90’s and early 00’s

90’s babies might actually enjoy 90’s music more than the people who were adults during this time! The 90’s were an amazing time, and if you’re anything like me, at least half of your wedding playlist will be 90’s music. The rest will be from the early 2000’s and a few hits from the current day. It might sound dated to some, but nothing will get the reception jumpin’ like a little Montel Jordan ‘This is how we do it’. Trust me!

5. You’re stuck between only having one kid or having another one… 5 years later
Listen, babies are expensive and toddlers suck! Us millennials are thinking really long and hard about how many children we want/ can even afford. Many of the married couples I know personally started the marriage with at least one child and are weighing their options as far as expanding the family further. Another trend I see among friends and acquaintances is waiting a few years before having another kid. This is a big difference between previous generations who typically had kids at 1-3 year intervals.

6. Your wedding ring is unconventional
I think the desire to be different, mixed with our financial situation (lol), has lead to a lot of millennials going the unconventional route when it comes to wedding rings and bands. Many millennials choose sapphires or other precious stones instead of strictly diamonds, which gives a unique look and saves money. Another trend is the one stone setting vs the multiple stones and diamond stuffed bands from previous decades. Some of us are choosing different metals as well. Rose gold, white gold, or black bands are very popular. Or you could skip all of those and get a band tattoo. Show the world are millennial you really are.

7. You did things ‘out of order’
Millennials definitely play it by their own rules and good for us! Not only are we doing things later but we are also doing things in a different order than the generations before us. The traditional Dating first, then Marriage, followed by moving in together and finally having a baby formula isn’t a given anymore. We like to do things when we want to do them! A lot of couples that go on to get married have children and/or live together first. These things have their pros and con’s. Either way, this is the new norm. No one is surprised to see a baby at the wedding and in some cases, a part of the wedding ceremony!

8. You’re a little…uh… over the top
With the internet, live television and social media apps, literally everything we do is broadcasted and shared with the world. So things like over the top pregnancy announcements, gender reveals and lavish prom send-offs are the new normal. Marriage and weddings are not left out of the fun. Now those surprise proposals are planned down to the detail, recorded and shared all over social media to announce the engagement and garner those likes! Some of them even end up going viral (remember the flash mob proposals?). 
The dramatics don’t stop there. Now Bride-to-Be’s are formally asking their gal-pals to be bridesmaids with lavish gifts, personalized cards and of course, documenting it all on camera. I don’t know about your family, but I’m pretty sure my mom just asked her sisters to be bridesmaids and called it a day! 
All of this is taking place before the save the date cards are sent. Which, in case you don’t know, are basically pre-wedding, wedding invitations. This is a trend that started in the early 2000’s as a way to give guests a heads up of the date a few months in advance if they needed to make travel arrangements or save for a destination wedding. Now many couples just send them because it’s a thing us millennials do now. I personally skipped this as a way to save money on my wedding, but I still had the engagement photo shoot… yeah that’s a thing now too. All of our moms are shaking their heads but hey, it is what it is!

9. Gadgets are the go-to gifts
Us millennials love our technology so of course gadgets are our go-to gifts. I have gotten and given all kinds of techie toys to and from my husband. I recently got Apple AirPods for my birthday, which topped my Amazon Fire TV. Both of which are used all day every day. So if phones, video games, gaming consoles, TVs and streaming devices are your go-to gifts for your spouse, you are definitely a millennial married couple.

10. You feel so young yet so old at the same time
Many of us have hit the age where we have high stipulations on what gets us out of bed and usually, we don’t agree to do anything that involves not being in bed after 9pm. It only gets worse when you are married but it doesn’t feel like a bad thing. Are love going out but once we get out we quickly realize that we could be snuggling in bed and that leads to our downfall. It is amazing being young and going out to party with your spouse but be prepared for the bed to be calling both of your names!

 

What other things make your marriage especially millennial? Let me know in the comments below or on facebook!